Oof. It feels like “something came up” for me every day this past week, and I hardly got any writing done at all. Family stuff, life stuff, calls, obligations, meetings, errands, even meals — things seemed to crop up as soon as I decided I should probably go write.
Or did they?
We’ve talked a lot about time management and prioritization both in these letters and on the Write Now podcast, and it continues to be a sticking point for me (and, judging by your comments and email responses, for many of you as well). It’s hard to fit All The Things™ into a balanced life, even if we’re committed to prioritizing and saying “no” to the right things.
If I’m being honest (which is hard, especially with stuff like this), I let my schedule steamroll me this past week because it was easier than facing my writing. I’m working on a difficult scene in season 2 of Girl In Space, and I’m not quite sure what happens next. It becomes easy to justify, to say, “I’ll just let that stew in the back of my brain while I do laundry,” or “I can get back to work on that tomorrow.”
I’ve said before that as creators, our creative work is often inseparable from life. When we go for a walk, we’re often thinking about our novel. When we do the dishes, we’re often daydreaming about our next podcast recording session. When we work out or drive somewhere, we’re often listening to the audiobooks and podcasts that refill our creative wells.
And the reverse is true, too — when we’re at our desk staring at our manuscript, but thinking about that afternoon’s phone calls or tomorrow’s meetings. When we’re technically “writing,” but not really paying attention to the words we’re putting on the page.
Some of this is normal and natural and maybe even healthy. But I think we all know, deep down, when we are making excuses, or avoiding our creativity altogether.
It’s so much easier to be a perpetual victim, especially to our schedule — all these things just came up and I had to [insert task or obligation here]! — but the truth is, we’re not victims, even though it can sometimes feel like it. We are in control of our lives and our schedules… right?
…Right?
I don’t want this post to turn into a preachy tirade about personal responsibility, because I’ve found that that tends to invite blame and shame and spirals of worthlessness (or, at least it does for me). “I have only myself to blame if I don’t succeed” might be technically true, but… wow, does it feel gross. Mostly because I don’t believe blame is ever productive — all it does is shut us (and others) down.
So I’d like us all to take a moment to just… forgive ourselves. To give ourselves a generous helping of grace and peace and love. To realize that we’re human beings, not writing machines or FocusBots or infallible success generators. We’re human beings, and life is busy and complicated and often downright hard.
Then I’d like us to take a deep breath, and without any shame or berating or self-scolding, to gently recognize that only we can tell our story, only we can bring our creative projects to light. So let’s move forward and do that, the best we can, in full acknowledgement of our own beautiful and messy humanity.
Words & warmth,
Sarah